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Friday, July 29, 2005
Takdang Aralin
 Ayan, medyo may improvement na. Salamat sa mga nagbigay ng link para sa iba't ibang klaseng templates. Wala pa din akong mapili kaya eto muna din ang gagamitin ko. May mga dinagdag nga pala ko sa sidebar. Medyo OA na nga sa dami ng nakalagay. Pero walang pakelamanan. Haha! subukan nyong lutasin yung toggler game dun. Ako naka-84 moves bago ko nasagot, eh. Yung pictures nga din pala sa taas ("Footprints in the Sand), eh pansamantalang naka-marquee muna. Ayaw talaga gumana nung converyor belt code na nood ko pa ginamit dyan. Marquee na lang muna gagamitin ko para lumabas na yung pictures kesa naman wala. Kaso di titigil yung pictures pag tinapat nyo yung cursore, eh di tulad nung conveyor belt. Aayusin ko talaga yan. Nga pala, Curious? Bala ka. : <spoiler> Sa Book 6 : Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, namatay si Dumbledor (ganire ba spelling nun?)... kaya kung binasa mo 'to, pasensya. Mahilig ka kasing mang-usyoso, eh. Yan tuloy. Hehe. </spoiler> Salamat sa teammate kong si Drake para sa mga cds na pina-burn ko. Solb solb na naman ako sa off ko pakikinig ng musika habang naglilinis ng banyo sa Linggo. Haha!  Happy, happy birhday sa kapatid ko, Trina (july 25) ; Xavier (Aug 9), kaibigan ko mula pa nung Grade 1 kaso labingsiyam na taon na yata kaming di nagkikita; Jovic (Aug 12),na di ko alam kung sino to sa mga kaibigan ko kasi ayaw lumabas ng picture sa friendster.. paiba-iba kasi to ng pangalan, eh; at Tina (Aug 1), na ayaw din lumabas sa friendster.. di ko alam kung classmate ko nung college o batchmate ko dito sa office.. Happy birthday sa inyo!.. Congrats sa barkada ko sa college na si Prezy at nakapagtapos na din sya ng 2nd degree nyang nursing... Medyo huli man 'to, Welcome back dito sa opis, Zig at Denise! May sweldo na ko. Pero syempre di ko yun lulustayin kasi may babayadan kami. Ok na na treat ko sa sarili ko yung cds at lunch sa mcdo bukas. Yung classmate kong si Julie Ann nung elementary nakasalubong ko dito sa may labas ng bldg namin. Di ko natawag, eh pero mukhang nag-apply siya dito. Oist Cy! Sabi mo mag-a-apply yung kaibigan mong si Mark dito. Sabihin mo ire-refer ko siya para pag nakuha siya, may 2k ako. Kung gusto nya hati kami. Basta text mo ko tas papuntahin mo dito. :teehee: Yun lang po. A more sensible post tomorrow before I take my off, I promise. It's just a so-so day today but it's good. 
posted by Arn  at 4:55 PM
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Wednesday, July 27, 2005
Hinanap hanap KitaYan, makalipas ang ilang buwang pagsisiyasat ay natagpuan din sa wakas ang larawang nasa kanang bahagi ng pahina ko. Tignan ang medyo nakakaalibadbad na mukha ng seryosong tao. Haha! Sinabi ko na naman dati na ang habol ko sa larawang yan ay yung nasa likod nyang puti't itim. Daghang salamat, Candy  . Uy, bigla akong natutong mag-Cebuano, a. Siya ang nakahagilap nito habang tutok sa paghahanap ng panibangong layout ng kanyang blog. Salamat. Thank you. Gracias. Xie xie.   Ngayon, ang susunod ko naman na hakbang ay gawin ang picture trail na nagho-hover dun sa may ilalim ng blog title ko. Di ko na alam kung anong problema. Pero nasakin na naman yung html code. Ngunit ayaw pa din gumana.  Sana magawan ko na ng paraan  tas paghahanap ng bagong template naman ang aasikasuhin ko. Gusto ko munang pahirapan ang sarili ko na maayos ang buong template bago humanap ng iba. Kaya kung sino may suhestiyon kung saan merong ok na template, alam nyo na kung ano gagawin. Tag me.  Nung una ay di ako makaisip ng paraan kung paano ma-e-edit yung picture kasi wala akong access sa paint at di ko makita yung infranview dito sa pc ko. Di ko rin naman ma-save maski gamit ang word. Kaya para sa picture editing, tip : use yahoo photos. Next mission : Conveyor belt slideshow 
posted by Arn at 4:59 PM
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Thursday, July 21, 2005
Sound. Smell. Taste. Sight.It is downtime during this hour of the day so I am blogging again and listening to somebody else's music files in our intranet.  ------------------Yung sinasakyan ko kaninang fx, eh bwiset. Oo. Maski na non-living thing ang isang sasakyan naiinis ako. Buti na lang na mabilis lang ang biyahe mula samin hanggang mrt station kundi na carbon monoxide poisoning na ako. Kasi naman maski pagkalakasan pa namin nung katapat ko sa upuan ang pagkakasara nung pinto sa likod, eh sumisingaw pa din yung amoy ng usok. Wala namang usok sa loob. Pero amoy talaga yung usok. Kaya nakakahilo.  Inobserbahan ko nga yung fx, eh talagang medyo palitin na. ------------------ I didn't like what I had for lunch. I thought that beef picadillo (Ok. That's giniling in it's glorofied name) would be a very nice pick from that canteen where I bought it. Heck! It looked like a smashed brain of a cat that crossed the super highway. Plus, those raisins added to its weird look.  (I hate raisins in cooked food.) ------------------To console myself... I am enjoying my Starbucks coffee right now. To date, pangatlo ko na 'to simula nung bumili ko ng kape sa kanila. Pero kanina first time kong bumili sa may branch nila dito sa may Ayala, sa may Standard. Bumili kasi ko ng spill proof na lalagyan nila. Eh, bibigay ko sa kapatid ko kasi birthday nun sa Lunes, July 25. Eh, madalas nagkakape yun sa office, kaya binilhan ko na. Sale nga pala ngayon dun sa branch na yun ng Starbucks. Kaso pag binili mo ng sale yung lalagyan nila, eh walang free coffee. Konti lang naman yung diperensya kaya regular price na lang binayaran ko para may mocha frap ako. Haay, yun na naman ang inorder ko. Sa susunod iba naman. Happy 22nd Birthday, Tin!  ------------------Polo shirt. Ok tignan. Simple. Pero bakit kailangan yung iba itaas pa yung collar. Di ko maintindihan kung idol ba nila si Elvis. Parang ang hirap kasi tignan. Parang ayaw lumingon nung may suot minsan. Ingat na ingat sa collar ng polo nila. Sige na nga. Pagbibigyan ko na yung gumagawa nyan kung fashion statement nilang ituturing yan. Baka dun na sila kumportable. But the devil in me says, "Ok, a. Parang galing ang buong suot sa isang manikin sa tindahan." Anything for the sake of fashion nga naman. *  I am not posting this to bash those who are considered fashionistas or fashion gurus. Siguro sinusunod talaga ng halos lahat ang trend. Nagtataka nga din ako kung ba't may tinatawag na guru. Eh, we are the master of our own body naman. So, dapat isuot natin kung ano ang dikta ng isip natin at hindi ang pauso ng ilan. ------------------Bakit nga kaya minsan naghihintay pa din ako na mag-sorry ang isang tao sa akin. Maski na sa maliit na bagay, madalas ang pagsasabi ng sorry ay nakakapagpagaan din ng loob para sa taong nasaktan. Sa ganung paraan, nalalaman nung tao na na-acknowledge mo na may mali ka. Kasi nung isang araw, eh my tumulak sakin sa mrt - shaw station. Alam kong rush hour pag uwian kaya nga paglabas nung mga bumaba sa shaw, eh umusad agad ako dun sa di ako masasagasaan nung papasok. Eh, bigla ba namang may kumapit sa balikat ko tsaka ako tinulak (sinadya man o hindi). Di pa nasiyahan at kumapit pang muli sa braso ko naman at tuluyan na talagang nawala yung balanse ko. Buti na lang at napasandal ako dun sa likod nung katabi ko at napahawak ako dun sa rail sa itaas. Sa inis ko ay nakapagsabi talaga ako ng, "Huwag naman po kayong manulak." Mahinahon ang pagkakasabi ko, a. Sinagot ako ng, "Hindi ako nanunulak. May nanulak sa akin." Sus. Hugas kamay pa. Eh, sino ba yung kumapit sakin ng 2 ulit?   ------------------Binalik ko na yung perang pang-Ilocos sana namin sa kaibigan ko. Siya kasi ang may sagot ng accomodation fee. Kaso bigla talagang na-cancel. Medyo nga kinakabahan ako nung nakipagkita ko para balik yung pera kasi nun lang kami ulit mag-uusap since ma-cancel nga yung trip namin. Alam ko kasi na di ko matatago na medyo inis ako. Eh, di yun. Ayaw pa ngang kunin yung pera kasi pinipilit akong sumama sa dinner kasama yung 2 pa nyang kaibigan. Sabi ko ayaw ko kasi umuulan at baka wala na kong masakyan pauwi. Idagdag mo pa na maaga pasok ko kinabukasan. Sabi ko next week na lang. Kaso aalis na pala siya next week. Sabi ko next year na lang. Sa totoo lang, ayoko din sumama talaga. Ang peke nga ng ngiti ko kagabi kasi pagod na din ako. Ok. Pwede bang mag-rant dito hinggil sa pagkakakansela ng trip namin sa Ilocos? Ayoko sana kaso medyo masama talaga loob ko. Higit dalawang buwan naming plinano ito. Una sana, eh sa Boracay ang tuloy namin kaso binalita nung isa naming kaibigan na isasara ang 61 establishments dun ng July - August for cleaning. Eh, di ang second option namin ay Vigan at Pagudpud. Pagkatapos ng mahabang pagpapalitan ng suggestions, eh nag-file na ko ng 5-day vacation leave nung May 23. Hanap kami sa internet ng pwedeng puntahan, tuluyan, sakyan.. yung schedules ng bus trips at flights ng PAL.. room rates.. pwedeng kainan.. Hinanda ko na nga na bibili ako ng boardshort na buti na lang, eh nawalan na ko ng panahon para bumili. Nakwento ko na naman dito yung araw na naghanda ako ng gamit. Kasi ang ikinainis ko lang, eh higit 2 buwan ang pagpaplano. Pumayag naman ang lahat sa mga napagkasunduan. All set na nga, eh. Bigla-biglang na-cancel ng hapon ng Sabado. Eh, Linggo ng umaga ang alis namin. Wala pang 24 oras eh kanselado na ng ganun ganun na lang. Kung di pa ko nakakita ng proxy para maka-access ng pex, eh di ko pa malalaman na cancelled na. Malamang naghintay at nagpalipas ako ng oras dito sa office nun para lang umabot ako sa sobrang agang oras ng alis namin kinabukasan. Pagkabigat pa kamo ng dala-dala kong mga gamit na iniluwas ko pa dito at isiniksik ko sa mrt. Tapos, iuuwi ko din pala. Alam na din samin na aalis nga ako for vacation tapos wala. Napahiya lang ako. Nabalewala yung 2 buwang pagpaplano. Nagsayang pa ko ng load sa kate-text at kakatawag para lang sa trip na to. Pati pagod ko sa paghabol sa meeting sa Gateway nung Huwebes para ma-finalize yung plano. In short, nabalewala yung lahat. Kahapon nga sinabihan ako nung kaibigan ko na, "Nagtatampo kayo sakin no? Kaya ayaw mong sumama..?" Ngiti lang talaga ang nasagot ko kasi wala talaga kong ganang makipagbiruan o makipag-usap. Nagpaalam nga agad ako kasi gusto ko na din umalis agad. Ayun, nabahagi ko lang.    ------------------Ang larawan sa ibaba ay kinopya ko lang sa blog ng isang taong di ko kilala.  Ang supposedly, ticket o stub (Cash coupon na nga, eh) ng isang ng-rally nung nakaraang araw sa Ayala. nakuha daw yan sa kalsada mismo. Kung sinoman ang nakawala neto, pasensya. Wala na ang tatlong daan mo. Tsk. Tsk. Pero ganito na ba talaga kahikahos ang ordinaryong Juan dela Cruz? Ni prinsipyo at paninindigan ay nabibili sa halagang tatlong daang piso? At sino si G. Nick Santiago sa buhay ng Pilipino?  ------------------Natatandaan nyo yung post ko dito na pinamagatang " Pabalang"? Kung hindi ay paki-click na lang po ang link na yan. Ayokong magdagdag pa ng sasabihin ko kasi baka maging bastos naman ako. Pakibasa na lang. Kasi gusto ko ulit ipaalala yan. If you think you are the one I am talking about, bang!  Sapul ka. ------------------Bilang panghuling entry sa post na ito, pakibasa ang reply ni Ventada ng PEx (Location: Paranaque, Join: Feb 2005) mula sa thread na Get a grip: There are more than 2 types of People . "Dude, shouldn't we be spending more time at the Stocks thread at the Working Filipino? =) This fiasco sent me all the way here at LAFI to pour out my frustration with the opposition which I have to accuse of creating a bear market. Many people here at LAFI could not comprehend this fact. After all, it is more of a political forum than an economic or financial space to to express one's economic analysis. In fact, I have no idea why I keep coming back to this forum and spend precious hours composing messages that will not and can not salvage the stock market. I guess I have a personal agenda, the stock market, and I believe it was GMA who made it work for me in the past few months and her enemies are what made the stock market work against me. I lost PhP5000 in the stock market due to this fiasco dude. What fascinates me in this forum are the different intentions of PExers who post messages in it. Some just want to sound profound, others just wants to practice their debate skills. The funniest observation I had in this forum is how people are engrossed with expressing their writing prowess without even listening. I've encountered arguments in here that gives you a rebuttal which doesn't reflect a single thought about your previous messages. Nobody listens, barahan lang ng barahan. In fact, nahawa na nga ako. " * Basta nung nabasa ko yung post na yan, parang pakiramdam ko, eh panapal yan dun sa mahilig magmarunong at magsasalita ng kung anu-ano sa mga forums. Akala mo na kung sila ang presidente o may katungkulan sa bansa, eh isang buka lang ng bibig nila magbabago na ang lahat. Nag-reply nga ako sa last paragraph nya ng, "maraming tinamaan dito at pihadong kumukulo na ang dugo at nanggagalaiti nang mag-reply. almost everyone here sounds like they're in a declamation or extemporaneous speech contest." Di ko lang maatim na gumawa ng alternick para makipagsabayan sa mga andun, eh. Basta ang alam ko, maski na sa pc ka lang nakaharap at nagbabasa ng posts, gigil ka p din lalo na't ikaw ang binira o tinamaan ka sa sinabi ng ibang nag-post. Wala naman kasi best in speech o best in whatever na award, eh ginagawa pang komplikado ang posts. Worse, nagpapaka-astig. Hoy! Kahit kailan, hindi magiging astig ang peke.  Kaya kung walang magawa, huwag magpapansin  sa mga messageboards o kaya'y gumawa ng katakut-talot na alternicks, uki?
posted by Arn at 3:58 PM
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Saturday, July 16, 2005
Of Sand and Waves
** It's July 16, Saturday. This is my supposedly entry for today. But blogger.com is blocked and the proxy settings we're using is mysteriously gone. Candy asked me to drag the proxy icon and transfer it to another folder. I dragged it. I don't know what happened next. It just disappeared. I never hit the delete button, ok. Why would I delete our "source of life" especially during downtime? Oh, well. I better check where it is now. But I could not do it alone. Teammates, I need your help. Let's help each other looking for IT for a better (source of) life. Haha! Most likely, this post would be published by next week since I need to send this to myself via my gmail account. After that, I need to go to the nearest net cafe and start typing my entry. You might get a little confused of the dates. My title shows how excited I am for my trip this coming Sunday. But I am not spilling anything about it for today. I do not want to spoil that excitement. That entry would be in another post. And promise that I would not be selfish to share some pictures. On with my post... We know how the waves change the sand. I am not trying to be deep (like the sea. Oh, I'm deep now. Haha!). I just made an analogy about the waves and sand with regards to a person and the environment. I arrived at ur house at around 9:30 in the evening yesterday. My mom was, of course, not yet home and was still in my grandmother's house. Since my mom retired from her job, she has been staying with my lola almost everyday. From 5pm til around 11pm. She arrives home usually at 11:30pm. Really late but she said she feels safer going home this late because there are still many passengers inside the jeepney compared to going home early. Perhaps, more people today go home late. My mom said she already manage to conquer her fear of going home late. She made herself stonger when she lost her husband, my dad. Change. So, I took the keys of my mom's room from my elder brother. He is, by the way, in his own house with his own family. I already knew that my eldest brother was in the living room watching tv. Our window was open that's why I saw him. I tried to open our front door but it was locked. So, he opened that for me. I pushed the door gently (take note: gently) but I did not close it. I went straight to my mom's room and open it. I was hungry so I needed to check what I have for dinner. Yes. There is a small refigerator in my mom's room. We do not use the big one that we have because it consumed almost 3/4 of our past electric bills. He was the one who closed the door. After a few minutes, my eldest brother walked away and left the tv open. See. I am not close to him and never will be. I just pass by him whenever I see him. I do not recall any good moments with him. Not even a conversation or a dinner on the dining table. I do not eat with him in our dining area, as a matter of fact. After he's hurt everyone in the family, I started hating him. We are his half siblings. Even us, he hurt so much. I wanted him to respect the fact that we are not fully and directly connected. So, why include us in his so called angsts? It is not a requirement to be cool and ok and good with my half siblings. They have their own life. We have us. Do not get me wrong. I take our bond with our half siblings a blessing. It is a good feeling that we are ok and we talk about things about life like any other brothers and sisters do. of course, I am not crossing out the eldest among us, but he seemed to be really alienated. Some still talks to him even my mom. But most just try to manage their own family and own life to avoid the hurt. I am speaking for myself. I am not talking to him. Before I tend to give one chance after the other. But now I feel numb. I am civil towards him. But do not expect me to have this affection we usually give to our family members and relatives. Change. I packed my things for my trip tomorrow morning, July 17th. After eating my dinner, I sorted the things that I would bring while waiting for the water to fill up the palangga (a laundrymate used during soaking, soaping and rinsing clothes when one opts to do the handwash method) I placed outside. I always try to check if all the possible water containers are filled before I sleep just incase no water comes out from the faucet tomorrow morning, at least we have some reserves. I got my adidas (Sorry. I have to mention the brands to specify things not to brag.) travel bag which I've been using for the past 8 yrs. I put a blue green towel inside. Then, my blue bench polo shirt with this red, black, orange details across the chest (Now I am the embodiment of my job. Teammates, I know you could also describe the details of almost everything that smells cloth. Haha!). I also put my blue beerkada shirt, the "I am lost in hong kong" shirt given to me by Kookai and my cargo shorts inside. That cargo short is brandless since i got that from SM dept store 8 yrs ago. Tagal na 'no? I even remember buying that even it didn't fit. I think it's waist size is 34" and I only wear size 28. But it's good. It's baggy and I realy like it. It doesn't look worn out. I went to my room and continued fixing my things. I placed the Softee cotton buds, Band Aid ethyl alcohol, Band Aid checker strips, rubber (What the hell are you thinking?) bands, some plastic bags for wet clothes, Zest rainforest fresh, 4 sachets of head& shoulders and cream silk blue (each), close up crystal pack, toothbrush, Balsem gosok (parang katinko) and comb in the pocket. On the other pocket, I putsome coins, Neozep non-drowsy, biogesic, diatabs and centrum tablets. I added two basketball shorts, two sandos, 1 extra white shirt, 4 undies and 2 boxer shorts inside the bag. I also took my brother's slippers inside. Sorry for being corny and specific. I am not brand conscious. You can jump and skip that part of my post. Hehe! I forgot. I met Cy at Super Bowl of China in Glorietta before going home. He handed me the money that we would use for the trip. He would be treating us since he just came back from Bahrain(?). Not sure. I know when I tell my story to my college friends about my trip, they would again tell me, "Pa-beach-beach ka na lang, ah." Most of them are still in school finishing medicine, graduate studies, second degree. Others just finished nursing. Probably they miss going to the beach or going out with all of us complete just like our collegiate years. All of us are not that updated anymore with what's happening with our own lives since we seldom see each other because of certain circumstances. This part of college is what I truly miss. Change. I also forgot to mention that we had a meeting for our scheduled trip last Thursday, July 14th, in a certain coffee shop within the Gateway mall area. I was the very last one who arrived because my shift ends at 7pm. So, Jaja and Mayk were seated on one side. Cy, at last we saw him, was with his two college friends, Clark and Mark. So talked, joked a bit. But in this coffee shop, one of my friends caught a couple having a quickie inside their restroom. They have money to buy that expensive coffee but they don't have any to get a motel room? Oh, come on. Doing it in public. Thrilling, wasn't it? Adventurous people nga naman. Changes. Remember this post? Well, I just saw her today at the pantry and she said hi to me with a smile. I hold nothing against her personally. She seems to nice. Probably, I need to know her better. I smiled back and asked her if it was already her endshift. We just had a very small talk. categorically, I think we are not friends. But who knows? Change. A few seconds before I set foot on the pantry, as I pass by this certain account, this girl caught my attention by telling me, "I like your hair." And she said that with a nice, big smile. Of course, I shied away and smiled (Was I blushing? Hmmm..). she was talking to someone when she looked to my direction and said those words. Change. (Change? Eh, asan ang pagbabago dito? Sagot: Kasi ngayon lang may nagsabi sakin ng ganyan. Pano mukhang "mahangin ba sa labas?" ang buhok ko palagi. Siguro mas madaming tao na ngayon ang nakaka-appreciate maski na hindi sobrang tuwid ang buhok mo gaya ng sa commercials. Si Jaja at Cy kasi sinabihan ako na magpa-hot oil at rebond daw ako. Ano ngayon? She likes my hair daw. :p) On my way to work, my classmate back in high school was my fellow passenger inside the fx taxi. I saw him waiting for a ride but he didn't take the one that I'm in. The fx taxi that I was boarding was caught by the LTO officer. So, I just transferred to another taxi. When I was about to hop at the back part, I saw him sitting at the middle area of the fx. Then, we had our conversation. Chester (C): Oi... Long hair, a. Ako (A): Ha? Hehe. C: Bakit ka nagpa-long hair? A: Lahat ng tao dun, eh long hair. Di, joke. Wala. C: san ka ba ngayon? A: sa call center. Ikaw? C: Naglalaro.. JRU. A: NCAA? Nag-aaral ka ulit? C: oo. San ka? A: Sa makati. C: Eh, di talo ka pa sa pamasahe nyan? A: ok lang. Hindi naman. Silence. Tulog. Bago bumaba, tinapik ko na lang siya sa balikat at sabi ko mauna na ko. Di ko alam na bababa din pala siya sa mrt. A: Di ba sa Pasig ka? C: Shaw. Malaki sweldo mo? Siguro 20 no? A: Hindi a. Starting 12 tas incentives. Regular, 15. C: Nagbo-board ka ba? Ba't ang laki ng bag mo? A: Hindi. May pupuntahan kasi kami, e. C: Long hair, o. Ibang-iba ka na buhat sa Arnold na nakilala ko, a. A: Ha? Uy, hindi, a. C: Panoodin mo kami. Nood ka ng tv sa Biyernes, may laro kami. A: Di na ko gaanong nakakanood ng tv, e. Yung sked ko kasi. Pero kung sa Biyernes na to, makakanood ako kasi naka-leave ako. Medyo nahuhuli kong maglakad kasi ang bigat ng bag ko. C: Long hair, dali. Iba na talaga 'to o. A: Hindi nga. C: Ano ba sked mo? A: 10-7. C: Buti di ka panggabi tulad ng iba. A: Dati panggabi ko. Ngayon lang ulit ako nalipat sa umaga. Naghiwalay na kami kasi wala pa pala siyang ticket. Eh, meron na ko. Sinabi ko na mauuna na ko. * Basta ganyan yung flow nung usapan. Natawa lang ako kasi iba nga itsura ko nung high school. Basta mas jologs. Tsaka kasi tahimik din ako nun. Basta di ako kilala. Kasi si Chester wala namang pinagbago. Matangkad pa din. Haha! Siguro ang iniba lang nya, eh varsity player sya ngayon. Di naman siya kagalingan nung high school. Di nga siya varsity player nun, eh. Ngayon, talo pa nya yung mga varsity player namin nung high school kasi siya naglalaro na sa NCAA. Dati di naman siya kilala na magaling sa basketball kasi di ko napansin na na-train siya dun. Di ko din akalain na maglalaro sya sa college. Change. * Watch NCAA every Wednesday and Friday on Studio 23. The games usually start at around 1-2pm. And some info on my former classmate? Just checkout the games and look for someone from JRU with a towering height and whose jersey reads Natividad at the back. I forgot to ask for his jersey number, though. Rewind. Yesterday, July 15th, I felt I was the hottest, most handsome, most desirable and most lovable man alive. Sorry, but I'm shutting my mouth about this one. It would be better to keep some things for myself alone. But to my reader who seems to be intrigued: don't worry. I am still a proud virgin ...Infant. Adolescence. Manhood. Change. Changes are everywhere. From blue jeans to faded.. black hair to grey.. green leaf to brown.. We all undergo the process. Most of the time, we are in a situation where no other option is given but change. Just like what the waves do to the sand, we are moved by the outside. But sand is still sand no matter how strong or high the waves are. No matter where the water brings the sand, it's still in it's form. No matter how fast the sand is swept away, in it's proper time, it would go back to where it came. Material. We.Human. We just have to go with the waves. But our selves are still intact. ** This post was done before lunch time. Kala ko wala nang pagasa na makapag-post. Pero look what I found. Este, di nyo pala makikita kasi di naman kayo naka-log in sa pc namin dito. Haha! Eto na ang aking post. Kalimutan nyo na yung unang paragraph sa taas, uki. Kantahan ko muna kayo bago ko umalis...     I'm going on a summer holiday...     Edited : 07.16.05; 4:57 pm   Cancelled na daw yung trip namin bukas. Si Jaja, isa sa mga kasama namin, nag-retract na ng leave mula nung sinabihan sya na cancelled na. Haayy.. Just this morning I was writing about sand and waves and changes. May sand at waves pa kasi kong nalalaman, eh. Huhuhu! Talk about Changes.   
posted by Arn at 2:25 PM
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Wednesday, July 13, 2005
Random Thoughts XVIIIPoliticking. To end the start of my work week yesterday, I came across another rally happening within the Ayala area. Actually, nakita ko sila habang lunchtime ko na nakasilong sa building namin kasi medyo umuulan nung hapon. Same route. I used the walkway to avoid the crowd. I was not suppose to pay attention to the rally but two things got me. 1.) On my way to the walkway, I heard a speaker/prayer leader saying, "Panginoon, pasukin Nyo po ang pintuan ng senado, ang pintuan ng kongreso..." Ok, napailing ako. Dasal yun so karapatan ng kung sinong namumuno na sabihin ang intentions nya. Pero sana lang sinama nya sa dasal nya ang kundisyon ng mga nagra-rally na kasama nya. Sana naman may pakain dun o di kaya may medics kung sakaling may hikain o anuman. 2.) Dito natawa talaga ako. Kasalukuyan akong nsa walkway. Lumalakad. Nang andun na ko sa Paseo, nakita ko yung mga kasamahan ni Bro. Eddie Villanueva na may dala-dalang mga walkie talkie. Hindi sa walkie talkie ang atensyon ko kasi di ko naman alam gumamit nun. Parang isang glow in the dark sticker ang dating sakin ng t-shirt ng mga taong ito. Suot nila ang kulay dilaw na t-shirt (Ito ang kulay na ginamit ni Bro. Eddie sa kampanya ny nung nakaraang eleksyon.) at may naghuhumiyaw na naka-print sa likod na "Bro. Eddie Villanueva for President." Wow. Prayer rally nga ito (con meeting de avanse). Ano ba yan? Clearly, political ambition just lounging on the corner. Pero sige bigyan natin ng benefit of the doubt ang mga taong ito lalo na si Bro. Eddie. Siguro naman hindi sila inubliga na iyong t-shirt na yun mismo ang isuot sa araw na yun. Wala kasi sa tamang pagkakataon at tamang lugar ang pagsusuot ng t-shirt na yun. Pwede rin naman ni-recycle kasi yellow t-shirt ang requirement na isuot para ma-recognize na maka-Bro. Eddie sila. Pero wala silang ibang yellow t-shirt kundi yung t-shirt na yun from the election campaign. Ay, si Bro. Eddie nga pala ang nagtatawag for a snap election. Maganda nga namang pagkakataon ngayon para mangampanya na agad. Inunahan na ang iba pang gustong tumakbo. Ginagalang kita, Bro. Eddie kasi pinaniniwalaan ka ng mga kapanalig mo. Di ko alam kung paano ka bilang isang spiritual leader. May kredibilidad ka kaya patuloy kang sinusuportahan ng mga sumasampalataya sa relihiyon/sekta mo. Bilang isang kapwa Bulakenyo mo at isang mamamayan ng Pilipino, hindi kita gusto bilang isang political leader. Madalas nating inihihiwalay ang batas ng tao sa batas ng Diyos. Siguro nga'y hasa ka na sa pagbabasa ng batas ng Diyos. Sana naman pagtuunan mo din ng pansin at kilatisin ang batas ng tao, ang konstitusyon. Hindi kita gusto. Lumalabas ang political ambition mo. Trapo. Pansin ko na naiibigan ko ang mga usaping politikal. Tumatanda na ata ako, a. O, hinde. On the lighter note, mabenta na naman ang buko juice, kwek kwek, squid balls, nilagang mani, mais at taho mamaya. Tiba-tiba sa negosyo yan. Paghusayan nyo. PS. Sana'y di nyo guluhin ang mga empleyado na nandito ngayon sa Makati at gumagawa ng paraan para naman kahit papano'y makatulong sa ekonomiya lalo na sa kani-kanilang mga pamilya. Yun lang po. ****************** On the contrary. Lagi na lang akong napapagkamalan samin na papasok sa eskwelahan. Tuwing magmamano ko dun sa ibang matanda samin, tatanungin ako na, "Papasok ka ba sa eskwelahan? Ba't di mo kasabay ang ate mo?" Pagsumagot ako na nagtatrabaho na ko, sasabihin minsan na, "Salamat sa Diyos." (Parang ang negative nito. Parang sa wakas may trabaho na ko. Eh, dati pa naman ako may trabaho, a.) O kaya, "Nagtatrabaho ka na ba? Graduate ka na ba?" Yung "ate" na tinatanong nila sakin, eh yung mas bata kong kapatid. Nagtatrabaho na din yun at 2 yrs ang gap namin. Minsan nga tinatong ko sila kung sinong ate ko ang tinatanong nila sakin. Siguro kasi mahaba ang buhok ko (Nakasanayan na kasi natin na sa trabaho dapat clean cut ka o medyo boy next door ang dating mo) at naka-casual clothes lang ako (Long sleeves, slacks, black leather shoes and belts are not part of my everyday wardrobe.). Babawiin ko yung una kong sinabi. Di pala ko tumatanda. Bumabata pala ako. Haha! ****************** My father's son. Habang naghihintay ako ng fx sa highway ay nakasabay kong maghintay yung kaibigan ng mommy ko, si Tita Zony, na nanay din ng barkada ko. Usap lang. Pupunta daw siya ng bukid. Tinanong din ako kung asan ang mommy ko. Sinabihan din nya ko na ang haba na ng buhok ko. Pero mas napangiti ako ng sinabi nya na mas kamukha ko na daw ang tatay ko ngayon. ****************** Just got 2 new shirts from Spoofs in Glorietta. They're actually t-shirts from my favorite comic book, Beerkada. I think the shirts would have a limited supply so go get one. One of my shirts read, goat milk? with a picture of a boy, at the right side of the back of the shirt, carrying a goat. Obviously, this is a spoof of got milk? t-shirts and the milk campaign in the US. My other shirt has this boy named Jimmy drinking on a fountain. The writings on the shirt are "Some drink from the fountain of knowledge. Some only gargle." True enough. I ust do not like it when I perspire. Parang may mapa yung t-shirt. Buti na lang at di nagkakaron yung sa may bandang kilikili ko. Kundi dyahe yun. Turn off baga. (Uy, nagbibinata.) But I do recommend the shirt. ****************** Bloated. I am happy to eat in this canteen at RCBC Tower. Cheap food. So-so place. Karinderya with a bit of class since it's in Makati. Feels like I am back in college. But I must find myself a lunchmate. ****************** ZZzzzZZ. I am 99.9 % sure that our scheduled post summer trip would push through. We still have two days to finalize everything. I need that vacation badly. ****************** To close this post. Got this from somone else's blog: [when] "if everything is coming your way, then you're in the wrong lane..." First, I would scream on the top of my lungs. Then, switch on the right lane.
posted by Arn at 9:42 AM
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Tuesday, July 12, 2005
PiercedI was in the mood to write something really good today. But it was spoiled by a post from someone else's blog. I didn't purposely look at the post. It just dropped right in front of my eyes. I hope you still remember my previous entry. I never thought that I have to do it again. I am hurt. I am not explaining my side. I am not in defense of anyone. I am a person. I am hurt. And when a person is hurt, he responds. Even if I deny it, this would be my reply to that post: I've loved this account for more than a year and six months. I love my teammates. I love who I've become. I love the opportunites that came with my stay here. I love the relationships I've made. The world needs no bubble-gum-pop-who's-trying-to-be-avril-lavigne-but-actually-a-britney-spears-inside. I hate high school angsts littered on my way. Grow up! ** Song dedication : God Bless The Child - Mishka Adams ** Uh-oh! I have this freaky feeling that any moment, somebody would be chasing me with a fork on her right hand. But with a mirror on the left. Geez! More and more people need more and more attention these days. Calling the paparazzis, bring out your cameras. I am not inviting a word war nor challenging anyone for that matter. My blog. My posts. My thoughts. Myself. ** UST lost to UP last Saturday, the first day of the UAAP. Just by 3 points. They were ahead by some points. But they were shaken off on the last few minutes. If only the Viva Hotbabes were there cheering and singing, "Basketball." Haha! Tigers, do better next time!
posted by Arn at 5:24 PM
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Saturday, July 09, 2005
Pilipino
Masa. Sinu-sino nga ba sila? Anu-ano nga ba ang gusto nila? Nasaan nga ba sila? At para kanino ang terminong ito? Madalas magamit yan, eh lalo na nung panahon ni dating Pangulong Estrada. Puro para sa masa ang ganito, ang ganire. Pati pala yung stored value card ko ng MRT, eh panahon pa ni Erap at may nakabalandrang mga salitang, "EDSA para sa MASA." Ako ay limang araw kung sumakay sa MRT mula norte pa-timog at pabalik, naglalakad din ako sa EDSA at minsa'y nakasakay naman sa bus. Kung gayon, masa din ba ako? Di ba ang salitang ito ay maaari ding itumbas sa buklod, grupo o kung ano ang mas nakararami? Hindi ako sigurado kung tama pero iyan ang rehistro sa akin sa tuwing mababasa, mapapanood at mapapakinggan ko ang balita na nag-uulat ng tungkol sa masa (Ano pa ba?) Medyo ganitong topic ang patungkol sa post ko ngayon. Nung lunchtime ko sa opisina ng mga 2:30 ng hapon ay naabutan ko ang mga nagtitipun-tipon na mga tao, o "masa" kung gusto nyo silang i-brand ng ganun, sa may Makati Firestation. Pagkatapos kumain, habang pabalik sa building namin, ay napansin kong sarado na ang kahabaan ng Ayala. At di nga ako nagkamali sa mga sumunod na nangyari. Papauwi ako ng makita ko ang medyo malaking grupo ng mga tao sa may estatwa ni Ninoy sa may Paseo. May nagsasalita. Di ko lang nadinig ng maayos at di ko pansin kung sino kasi sa walkway ako dumaan. Habang sakay naman ng MRT ay napansin ko ang grupo ata ni Bro. Eddie na nasa EDSA-Annapolis at may rally din. Napailing na lamang ako at nagkibit-balikat. O, "masa" ba ang kasama nila? Kung oo, e ba't wala ako dun? Ordinaryong tao. Naghihikahos. Isang kahig, isang tuka. Naaapi. Walang karapatan. Mahirap. Iyan kadalasan ang mukha ng sinasabing masa. Yung walang kotse.. wala halos matinong trabaho o kung grabe pa, eh wala talagang trabaho.. palaging nasa welga.. Ganyan na lang ba talaga? Kung kasapi ako ng masa, di ako papayag na ganyan ang tingin sakin. Kumbaga, ibahin mo ko dahil may sarili akong pakiramdam, may sarili akong bibig at higit sa lahat may sarili akong isip. Masa - tanging gamit at pagasa ng mga pulitiko sa personal nilang interes; mabilis magsawa; mabilis maniwala; kawawa. Iyan ang aking depinisyon. Ngayon, kung sa tingin ko ay nabibilang ako sa nakararami na "masa" nga ang termino, malamang nagamit na din ako, napaniwala na din ako ng mabilis, kawawa din ako. Hindi ko alam kung ang masa nga ba talaga ay ang mga taong mahirap, katamtaman o marangya ang pamumuhay. Naiisip ko din na halos ang mga mas naghihirap lang ay ang mga katutubong walang teknolohiya o kuryente man lamang sa lugar nila. Maraming mahirap sa Metro Manila? Eh, halos bawat bahay nga na nadaanan ko sa may squatter's area dun, eh may washing machine, electric fan, VCD/DVD player, stereo at naglalakihang colored TV. Yun ba ang masyadong mahirap? Na pag dumadaan ang isang sasakyan sa may riles na sakop nila, eh kailangang magbukas ng driver ng bintana at maghulog ng barya sa tabong itatapat sa salamin ng sasakyan? Eto pa isa kong sentimyento, ah. Maraming galit sa mayayaman. Pati mayayaman din naghihirap o nagtitipid. Maaaring nakuha nila ang kanilang yaman sa pagyapak sa karapatan at pang-aabuso ng kahinaan ng mahihirap [ok, wag na mga mahihirap.. basta tao na nakasalamuha nila]. Meron din naman yumaman dahil sa ambisyon, sipag, pagpupursige at tiyaga. Wag naman natin masyadong sisihin ang mayayaman. Tandaan natin na di nila tayo sagot sa buhay natin. May sarili din silang buhay. Kung gusto nilang tumulong, eh di pabayaan natin. Huwag natin silang obligahin. Minsan pa nga mayayaman pa biktima ng krimen na may kugnayan sa salapi. Pera lang ba ang kailangan natin sa kanila? Hindi ako mayaman. Ako'y katamtaman lang. Pero may mga kaibigan akong may kaya talaga. Ibahin naman sana natin ang imahe sa ating isip na basta mayaman ay ganito o ganyan. Nagbabayad din sila ng buwis na minsan ay malaki pa nga kesa sa binabayaran ng kakarampot lang ang kita. Nakasaad naman sa batas yun. Pareparehas lang tayong sumusunod at dapat sumunod sa batas. Kaya pwede sana, eh wala nang hatian o pag-label na mayaman ka kaya dyan ka. Mahirap ako kaya dito ko. Alam ko dapat ilagay natin sa lugar ang ating mga sarili. Di rin kasing dali na ipaliwanag na pareho lang ang mayaman, katamtaman at mahirap na tumatae, inuubo, nagugutom, atbp. Pero sana pahalagahan natin ang bawat isa bilang tao at lalo pa kapwa natin Pilipino. Isa pang sentimiyento, para sa mga sinasabi at pinapatungkulan nilang "mahihirap" daw. O, sige. Mahirap nga ang kadalasang di kumakain 3 beses isang araw, walang kuryente, walang supply ng tubig, walang trabaho, di nakapag-aaral, atbp. nakapanlulungkot na dahilan. Pero di ba maski na mahirap ka, eh may buhay ka pa din? Alam ko di ko alam kung pano maging mahirap kasi nga baka mamaya, eh "katamtaman/ average Filipino" ang antas ng pamumuhay ng pamilya ko. Ngunit may mga kaibigan at kamag-anak akong nasa hirap. Pulos negative kasi ang dating pag sinabing mahirap. Parang katumbas na ng walang pagasa. Parang pag walang tulong mula sa isang tao, eh wala na yung drive sa buhay. May mga kaibigan akong mahirap na tinulungan ng isa pa naming kaibigan na mayaman na mapasok sa trabaho. Ano ginawa? Imbes na pagbutihin, eh umabuso pa kasi nga kakilala nila yung kaibigan namin. Ayun, eh di napahiya at nasira pa tuloy yung kaibigan kong nagpasok sa kanila. Kung tutuusin, eh wala naman sa antas sa lipunan yan, eh. Nasa pagkatao, nasa prinsipyo, nasa kung anong ugali meron ang isang tao. Aba. May mga galing sa hirap na maski mahirap pa din hanggang ngayon, eh tapat at maganda pa din ang pananaw sa buhay. Oo, ang buhay ay hindi isang pantasya. Ngunit kelan pa naging mali na gumawa ng mabuti o tama? Sa pangkaraniwang rally, mga ordinaryong tao ang nakikita ko talaga. Meron mga estudyante na maaring mayaman din dahil nasa isang eksklusibong paaralan. May mga walang trabaho na dumaraing na solusyunan ito ng gobyerno. May mga magsasaka, pari, driver, marahil my tambay din na humihingi at ipinaglalaban ang para sa kanila. Siguro nga sila ang nagre-represent satin. Kasi lahat ng tao may reklamo pero di naman lahat nagwewelga. O, di para dun sa mga walang oras magwelga, eh sila na ang kinatawan ng nakararami. Ayan, may "nakararami" na naman [masa?]. O, paguwi ko ng bahay nagbukas ako ng tv para malibang naman ako kasi nga nakakapagod ang biyahe, sino nakita ko? Si Binay, si Escudero, si Cory, si Dinky. O, resign daw si Gloria. Di ba may investigation pa nga at pine-play pa yung full length conversation niya dun sa kun sinuman yung Garci na yun? Oo, sige. Sa surveys at mga hinaing, kokonti na lang ang may tiwala sa pamahalaan partikular kay Gloria. Ano gusto nila? EDSA People Power na naman? Pwede ba? Kung paulit-ulit na ganyan, eh ang barbaric tignan. Alam ko may sariling stand yung mga opisyal na nabanggit ko. Kaso karamihan sa kanila taga-oposisyon. Madarama mo ang pagkaatat na sila ang humawak sa panguluhan. Gayun din ang tingin ko kay VP Noli na maski galing siya sa administrasyon. Willing naman si Gloria na mag-undergo ng impeachment sa kongreso, eh di simulan na. Sundin natin ang batas, ang konstitusyon. Alamin kung ano mismo ang laman ng tape at hindi pagtuunan ng pansin ang edited version na parang ang malisyoso nga talaga ng dating. Kung maaalis si Gloria sa matino at legal na paraan, payag ako dun. Basta sa ilalim ng batas dumaan. Rally. Rally. Rally. Napanood nyo ba yung comment ng isang elected official ng Cebu. Sinabi nya na hindi lang dapat ang mga taga-Metro Manila ang nagdedesisyon kung sino ang presidenteng gusto nila. [Nadinig mo ba yan Cory? Eh, ikaw Chiz? Ikaw Noli? Ikaw Gloria? Eh, yung mga kasapi ng CBCP? Ikaw Richard? Ikaw Rez? Ikaw Susan? Ang AFP at PNP?] Di ba ang Mindanao ay nagpahayag na din ng dismaya at may inilabas na sa media na gagawa na lang sila ng sarili nilang republika? Yung hihiwalay na sila sa Pinas. Pati dun sa probinsyang binisita ni Gloria [Di ko matandaan kung Iloilo, eh.], sinabi nung elected official dun na para di na siya guluhin ng mga taga-Maynila, eh pwedeng-pwede niyang ilipat ang office of the president sa probinsiya nila at tatanggapin siya doon ng buong puso. Ang US, Japan, European Union, Libya, UAE, atbp ay nagpahayag na din ng suporta sa pangulo natin. Kung matibay ang ebidensya, eh di imbestigahan na. Eh, ba't kasi ang daming umeepal. Oo nga't may kani-kaniya tayong opinyon. Lahat tayo Pilipino, eh. Siyempre concerned tayo sa bansa natin. Lagi na lamang Pilipino kontra sa kapwa niya Pilipino. Personal na interes lang kaya. Concern sila sa bansang Pilipinas pero sa bandang huli, eh maisasakatuparan na nila ang kanilang nais. Paano na nga ba ang masa? Bakit puro masa na lang? Eh, pano yung di makamasa o nabibilang sa masa? Problema na ba nila yun kung di sila kabilang? Eh, bakit kaya hindi natin sabihin na para sa kapwa natin Pilipino? ** Sa susunod na eleksyon, DI ko iboboto kung sinuman ang kandidatong gagamit ng mabubulaklak na pananalita na ang puntirya ang masa. Di lang ang tinatawag nyong masa ang Pilipino. Wala akong background sa pulitika. At pagiging isang kalihim lang ang pinakamataas na pwesto ang natamo ko sa eskwela. Ngunit ngayon, alam ko na pati ako, sa ayaw ko man o hindi, ay sakop pa din ng pulitika. Gusto ko lamang mapatupad ng maayos ang batas. Ano ang ibig sabihin ng politically correct? Kung sino nakakaalam mangyari pong ipagbigay alam lamang sa akin sa gamit ang aking tagboard o haloscan. Salamat. Ang post din na ito ay bugso ng aking pananaw sa Masa Thread ng PEx
posted by Arn at 11:55 AM
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Friday, July 08, 2005
Pride And School SpiritPlease watch out for tomorrow's opening of the UAAP games. Adamson University is this year's host. Most likely, show starts between 12 pm to 1 pm on Studio 23. For more info, just click on the photo below.  Of course, we still have the eight universities competing in more than one sport. But the highlight of the event would definitely be the basketball games. Second, I suppose, is the cheerdance competition.  Cheers to my school, my team! ****************** Bummer : UST lost the championship to DLSU on the Shakey's V - League volleyball tournament last night. It was La Salle's second straight title. But UST was the one who clinched the first trophy since the league started. Win or lose, UST would still be a pain in their ass.
posted by Arn at 6:14 PM
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Wednesday, July 06, 2005
Where Am I?
While walking on the street.. riding a public utility vehicle.. lying on the comfort of the bed.. puffing cigar alone at the smoking area of a coffee house, food court or building.. watching tv or doing something then a sudden blank stare.. You have to agree with me that during these times, question knock and linger your mind. Uhm, no? Well, it should be a yes answer. It must be. If not you seem to be dead and lifeless. Just joking. Most entries on my blog are usually about the ordinary things that I do. My routine, my trippings, my cycle and everything my hands and feet could do. In short, my life. Yes, I consider mine just as ordinary as the rest of you. Lately, I've been thinking about this particular thing that I know makes everyone giggle, smile, sigh, and so on. This particular thing called love. [Do I see eyebrows raising?] To make this point staight, I am not romantically linked or attached with someone. Nill. Nada. Nothing. Everyone is in love. We exist to love. The world is a beautiful place to live because of love. But is love really the answer? If so, then what is the question? This post would not focus on love per se but on singlehood. Yes, I am single. An oh-so-hot-dude-with-a-katawang-pangromansa-sculputed-with-washboard-abs-and-a-loaded-head-attached-on-the-shoulder helluva guy. Hahaha! Thanks for reading but that description would never be me. On with the topic. Being single doesn't mean that I am not in love or I am alone or I am in deep need of that sweet caress while you hold me in the darkness and take away my sadness(I am hearing Breathe's "Hands To Heaven"). It is not also being unlikable, unattractive, loser, weird, sad, unproductive, deprived. For me it's more about being one with yourself. Though, I admit that I still have to fix and resolve alot of things. But I am still one. It's not hurrying or forcing yourself to be in a situation where everything would only be ideal. It's not kissing an almost dead princess and instantly falling in love with each other. Or kissing a frog that would transform into a prince. The quest would be great. The search brings thrill. I myself look forward to a new day packed with lot of things to anticipate and later on, enjoy. But this something in me tells me that I would not want to be just somebody else's conquest. Just like when you're going to Davao and you just stopped over at, let's say Cebu. I bet you would adore Cebu but it's Davao that you came for. Do you get what I mean? Perhaps, I am just afraid to be part of the experience. I want to be your experience. I do not want to be just part of your journey. I want to be the end of your journey where you would say "mission accomplished." Perhaps, I am afraid of the idea which I install in me that I am just used or played by or overtaken. [Why the hell would I think negatively about myself?.. Yes, why? I need to answer my own question.] Sometimes, the imagery of an orange fruit crosses my mind. Like I am this plumpy, juicy, sweet and soft fruit. Then, after being consumed, I am all squeezed out and thrown. Trash. Buried. Decomposed. You know, when you're already done with something you just throw it. Ouch! Everyone who chooses to love takes risk. And it's a big risk to let loose and have someone enter your life. I guess, I just have to accept the fact that no matter how I protect myself from hurting, I would be hurt along the way. And it's only in risks where I would know myself better, improve myself more and learn to appreciate positive things more. I just wonder. Most of my friends who are very much single are the best looking ones. All my friends look good in their own way. But I couldn't help to notice them. Are they waiting for that someone who's equally good looking or someone who matches their level of success? I may not be also the best looking human on earth. But I know I look good. Ehem! And to answer the question on the paragraph above, I am not looking for any match. Usually, I am attracted to the opposite. No. Not to ugly girls [my own definition of the adjective]. Sometimes it kills me when a cousin or a close friend asks about the current situation of my heart [Sinong girlfriend mo?] . I only have one answer to them which is, "Ha? Wala." [None.] And they would insist. "Wala nga," [Nothing, really.] would be my follow up. Funny thing is, that question usually comes from my single friends as well. Haha! I think being also the eldest in the family somehow hinders my "flourishing" lovelife [I am not admitting anything]. I usually think of something to better the status of my family. Instead of going out, I just save the money to pay the bills or buy something to put inside the fridge. I am so preoccupied, if I may say. I also have this feeling that I am not going to perform well being a boyfriend. Ooh! Performance. Not sex. But the responsibility, obligation, duty. I tend to please to the point that abuse would mean something about caring for the one I love. I would be blinded by my feelings. And I would not want that to happen. But first, there shouldn't be any constitution or 10 commandements in a relationship, right? I hate nagging. I hate so much dependence. I need my personal time to be really my personal time. My own. The relationship should not stop me from growing as an individual. I think lovelife or a romantic relationship is a slice of life. Same goes with family, friends, sports, hobbies that would take their own slices. I mentioned sex, did I? Alright, I am not pro or against prematial sex. If couples consider this as a part of their relationship, that's their choice. That's their responsiblity. Having sex, getting naked, smooching in public are not signs of maturity for me. They just abuse the word. Being of legal age doesn't authorize us to do what we usually see on American films. We shouldn't be imitating or acting like them in the first place. I know it's not our culture and it is also an issue whether we, young people, should decide what we think is good for us. Being 23 doesn't justify that I am ready to take full responsibility of what might happen after sex. Again, age doesn't justify the level of maturity. And sex is a personal choice. As posted above, if it happens, it happens. Alone and not lonely. That's what I am today. Perhaps tomorrow. Definitely not for a long time. Best things come if you're single. You're would becomes this wide cinema screen unlike being so into your lovelife where you just see his/her face from morning til night. More time for yourself. More time to travel and explore nature, other culture and probably other people. As to where I am now? That is for me to know and for you to find out. More than walking on the street, riding taxis, lying on bed and staring blankly, my life is just in front of me. ****************** In line with my title, I was a bit lost earlier today. The MRT train was busted and it could only take the passengers to Shaw Blvd. So, that's 4 stations away from Ayala. I had no choice but to take the bus headed southside. I think the bus conductor didn;t understand me when I told him to drop me off Ayala. By the way, the signboard of the bus read Ayala Ilalim. Other buses' signboard read Ayala ibabaw. I didn't know the difference. I just took the one with Ayala Ilalim sign. But still, the conductor seemed to be out of coins for change so I said to just drop me off Buendia. I thought it would be a short walk. I walked. And saw Makati Ave. My smiled and told myself that I am near the office. I walked again and saw Paseo. "Oh, I'm nearer," I told myself. I waklked and saw another street's name. I walked and another unfamiliar street name greeted me. I was crossing intersections and passing by huge buildings which are new to my sight. After walking and perspiring and traversing the road to nowhere, I found this huge blue wall just right on left side view from my eye. Heck! I was already in front of my workplace. [Finally, I was able to notice the Yellow Cab Pizza store in between Tokyo Tokyo and KFC at the ground floor of our building.]
posted by Arn at 2:58 PM
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Tuesday, July 05, 2005
The Excited Morning PersonHi everyone! Well, I am now back on a morning shift. That's 10am - 7pm. This is my first day of my new schedule. I am excited since I get to be with the "normal" crowd on the streets. Usually, when I am walking towards my work place, most of the people are going the other way - going home. But before I get comfy with this new schedule, I made some preparations. Not big deal preparation. I just did somethings ahead of time since going home at 7pm would not allow me to do some things compared to my past schedule where I go home at 9am. 1. I had my teeth cleaned and some filled last Saturday. Took advantage of my Maxicare benefits. I know it would be hard to schedule an appointment if my shift ends at night. 2. Last Saturday also, I had my hair trimmed at Bench/ Fix - Greenbelt. Again, that day was my last resort since I was still within Makati that day. And ending my shift in the morning would give me more time to finish some things and less for sleep. Oh, well. * I also saw Chico of RX 93.1 at Glorietta and Nyoy Volante at Greenbelt. 3. After an hour of thinking what cd to get, I finally have a copy of Mishka Adams' debut album "God Bless The Child" from Music 1 also in Greenbelt. * There are a lot of great finds especially in OPM. I never knew that Stonefree already released their debut cd "Hibiscus." I knew about the band and their music since the reality tv show Single aired on ABC 5. * Good thing the record store has 7 Shots' Love and Hate album in the rack. * I was once again tempted to listen to Black Eyed Peas' Monkey Business album. * Rachelle Anne Go looks really, really sexy on the cover of her repackaged album. I stay tuned to ASAP just to see her sing and smile and look at the camera. Oh, I'm talking about music, right? I just hope she comes up with a nice RnB album. * Bamboo's second installment is one of the best I've heard among all the cds in the listening area. * Motown's Greatest Hits, I like also. ** To sum all these cds I've mentioned, that'd be at least 3 thousand bucks right off my pocket. That's alot but I ain't buying pirated ones. 4. I went to buy some groceries before I went straight home. And I realized that it's been sometime that I haven't bought Wiggles, twisted marshmallow coated with mocha-choco flavor - one of my guilty pleasures. 6. Last Sunday, it was only me at home. My whole family went to my Lola's house because it's their fiesta in their place. I decided not to come because I felt tired that day. My mom asked me what do I want for lunch so she could prepare before they leave. I saw my aunt with her paninda. I bought pang-pinakbet na gulay (mixed vegetables), bagoong (shrimp paste) and daing na maliliit na isda (small dried fishes). The first two I cooked for lunch. Again, while doing that, I realized that it has been a while since I last cooked even just for myself. The only complaint I have for my dish was the taste. It was too spicy. I chopped the green chili and added all with the veggies. I cooked daing for dinner. You usually fry daing with an ample amount of oil and low heat. After 3-5 minutes, it's done. As for may sawsawan, excess bagong from my lunch and vinegar gave me that urge to eat more than I could. Plus, I didn't use any utensils. Just my bare hands. I eat more when I use my hands. Imagine the scene. I really am from a barrio. 5. To top things off my excitement for my much anticipated morning shift, I went to Mass yesterday at 6 pm. As I've said on my post below, I miss going to Mass on weekdays. I was quite hesitant since it was raining at my place yesterday. Gladly after I woke up from my siesta, the sky was all bright. It's half an hour drive from my house to kabayanan (town proper), where the church is located. I was able to manage not to be late for the Mass. I even had time to drop by first the Adoration Chapel, light a candle and pray. I bought sampaguita flowers after. Before I went home, I bought another pack of Wiggle. I finished my first pack, which has 24 pieces, in one day. Now, I still have at 19 pieces left in my second pack. I am now back at the morning shift. Note: Morning, not mourning. It was only over a month that I, together with some of my teammates, spent a night shift. From 12 am to 9am, my schedule is now 10 am to 7 pm. Not bad. But almost at least 2 thousand bucks would be lacking in my payslip since I do not have night diffs and special shift allowance anymore. And for sure, my performance bonus would be affected since it's really hard to meet the required average handling time during the day. Both schedules has it's pros and cons. I just tell myself that it's much more peaceful to sleep at night. I get to see more people walking along the street in the morning. and hopefully, I get to bump with one of my classmates, friends and cousins in the street or bus. Best of all, nothing beats dealing with a "normal" life. My biological clock missed the Philippine time zone. I am more excited to go to work during daytime. I hate to choose. But I love the sun as much as I love the moon. I need to pick one. And so I choose the sun.
posted by Arn at 12:57 PM
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Friday, July 01, 2005
Things that I miss (just some)I won't count. I don't want to remind me of the NUMBER of things I am missing. * yung ginagawang parang suman ng daddy ko sa sinagang. Binibilot nya sa kamay at ihuhugis na suman. Uhm, I miss my dad more than that rice thing. *mushy mode on* * yung mga nawawala kong laruan na na-free ko sa candy at cheese curls noon. Pati na din yung iba kong laruan na nabili ko sa SM at sa tapat ng school namin nung elemtary. Ang natira na lang sakin ay yung Transformer at isang baka at tupa.. Nasaan na yung Bioman na robot ko? * yung apa (ice cream cone) na matamis ng dirty ice cream * my co-workers on my first job. Also, the smell of veegum, sodium saccaharin, aerosil, methylene and the like. Hehe! (You think I've worked in a shabu lab, don't you?) * ang aking lumang 5210 na binigay ko na sa kapatid ko * after laboratory class snacks at Asturias St. kasama ang tropa ko ng college lalo na pag 7am-7pm ang class. Kadalasan footlong at canned softdrinks lang tas kwentuhan. * nung panahon P2.00 pa lang ang pamasaheng binabayad ko sa jeep. P1.50 ang minimum fare nun kaso di sakop ang baryo namin. Ngayon, tumataginting na P8.50 na ang bayad ko. * noong naliligo pa kami sa sapa maski na madumi at yun ang ginagawang labahan, palikuran, basurahan at kung anupang mag -han sa dulo ng mga nakatira dun. Yung naka-bike kami at naglilibot sa bukid.. yung paliligo sa ulan at hagisan ng putik at mga butete.. yung pamimingwit ng liwalo, tilapia, palaka at bulig.. yung paglalaro ng taguan, bakal-moro, habulan, tumbang preso, payaw, tex, video karera, baligana at kung anupa.. yung panunungkit ng mangga, duhat, santol, buko, bayabas.. tambayang inaabot ng kinabukasan.. yung pagsusugal.. yung away sa kalagitnaan ng party at sa ibang baryo.. yung malulutong na murahan pag nagbibiruan at nagkapikunan.. yung hindi pa apektado ng makabagong teknolohiya, fashion at krisis sa ekonomiya ang buhay.. sa madaling sabi, usapan sa may tambayan kasama ang mga kababata ko. * my rosary which I lost almost two months now. I've been keeping that since 2nd year high school. I used to bring that everywhere I go. * listening to the radio. When I plug mine, I just pop a cd or a cassette tape and play it til I get bored. I don't know why it is hard for me to fix my antenna and hit the remote to fm. * si Jamsie, ang pinaka-loyal, pinakamaganda at pinaka-bestfriend (pinaka na nga, best pa) naming aso. * birthday cakes. I just had one when I was a year old. Sa birthday ko, pramis. May birthday cake ako para sa sarili ko. * YM nights. It's self explanatory esp. to Jaja, Cy, Jomark, Bern and the rest of my friends. Ang dami na kasi sites na naka-block sa office including yahoo mail and even blogger. * PEx nights. O, nagsisimula yan sa "P". Baka mamalikmata kayo't iba ang pagkabasa nyo. * boarding house life though mine was boring * sari-sari store at street foods. Ngayon kasi di na masasarap ang mga tigpi-pisong mga cheese curls, candy o kukutin sa mga tindahan, eh. Di tulad noon. Remember Biokit, Kentucky, Pompoms, Ikasen? At yung puto seko, adong, tootsie roll, bazzoka, tarzan, kariba, tira-tira, sundot-kalikot, bubble gum iba-iba kuly na singko isa.. pati yung pinakamasarap na magtinda samin ng ihaw-ihaw, eh wala na. Ayos pa naman ang dugo at isaw dun. Pati yung mangga na nilalako at yung maanghang na may tamis na bagoong. * my "1st year in college" attitude. Mas malakas ang loob ko nun maski mahiyain ako. Pag may ginawa ako pinaninindigan ko talaga. Kumbaga walang pakialam sa mga sasabihin ng iba basta alam kong tama ang ginagawa ko. Ngayon kasi ang dami ko pang kino-consider. * Yung cartoons at superheroes noon. (Bioman, Machine Man with Buknoy, Shaider, Annie and her white panty [haha!], Fuma Lay-ar, Ida and her time space warp dialogue, Go-bots, Voltron, Ultraman, Karate Kid, Dinoriders, He-man, She-ra, Tigersharks, Visionaries, Inhumanoids, Legend of Zelda, Ewoks, A Dog of Flanders, Sarah, etc.) * fights with my brothers and sister. We seldom do nowadays. Is this because we are maturing or are we just aging? Hmm. * poetry writing. I've stopped writing since last year. This job really consumed me. * Tivoli crunch bar and funwich. * My former teammates and college friends *hikbi* 'nuff said. * going to church to hear mass on weekdays. Basta iba pag konti lang ang tao sa simbahan at di crowded gaya pag Linggo na parang mall o park ang simbahan. * seeing a rainbow. I want to take a picture of it and post that here. * early 90's OPM music. When E-heads were still playing their music and Viktoria was the mtv queen. When Genie of Kulay was still alive and Metropop was still cool. * the nintendo family computer. My favorites are School Fighter, Twin Bee, Kung Fu, and the most popular game of all, Mario Bros. I miss the "up-up.. down-down.. left-left.. right-left.. a.. b.. select.. start" presses on the controller to get a hundered lives in Contra. * field demostrations during academy day in elementary and foundation day in high school * I miss not worrying too much. Let me say this in the future tense : I would miss the graveyard shift. I'm about to take my new schedule on Tuesday. I'd be on from 10am til 7pm. I've already adjusted with my 12am - 9am shift. But I have to take an AM shift since all three of my siblings are already staying in Manila. Someone should be at home at night. I would miss the moon and the stars on lunch time. ****************** As I wa typing this entry, I got a call from a customer verifying his order. I told him that it was cancelled because my manager didn't get any reply from the message that was left for him in his voice mail. Fortunately, he was in a good mood driving in his car as he placed a new order over the phone. Take note of the birthday message he got for his girlfriend/wife: I wanted to give you the world but I couldn't fine the big enough box. Happy Birthday! Go bananas! -- Love, [customer's name here]
posted by Arn at 1:26 AM
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